The "Real World"

I spent some time today thinking about the mythical "real world" that happens after college. I really hope this isn't it. I've decided to compare and contrast my idea of the Real World and this experience.

Real World: People get up in the morning and go to work. They come back in the evenings, relax, and go to bed.
Montana: People get up whenever they do and might go to work. Just because they're on the schedule does NOT mean they feel an obligation to be there on time, or at all for that matter. They get back approximately whenever their shift ends (assuming they went), eat, go out and get in a fist fight, drink some more, wobble back in at some awful hour, and collapse (hopefully into their bed).
Real World: Newspapers tell news. Magazines spread either gossip about celebrities or more news.
Montana: Newspapers have a headline article about a local cancer survivor who participated in a Walk-a-thon, a list of short bios of all that year's high school graduates, and a heartwarming store about a man mauled by a bear and his park ranger savior reuniting five years later. Magazines with tips on hunting, fishing, and "how to find the perfect ATV" are the most popular.
Real World: At the grocery store, people buy milk, eggs, bread, vegetables, meat, and other assorted food products.
Montana: At the grocery store, people buy beer and cigarettes.
Real World: People gravitate toward family life - marriage, children, settling down.
Montana: People run away from family life. Instead, men have multiple girlfriends and/or wives and/or friends with benefits. And women the opposite. Well, except for some women... This is until they reach a certain age, approximately 55, when they decide to marry or enjoy bachelor(ette)hood permanently.
Real World: Radio features advertisements for All State Insurance and McDonalds. Radio contests give away concert tickets.
Montana: Radio features advertisements for crop hail insurance and bear spray. Radio contests give away tickets to the next rodeo. Each radio station features a weekly talk show with a local fishing expert who gives advice on when and where to go fishing that week.
Real World: Shopping involves a choice of which store to go to and often involves malls, outlet stores, or other shopping centers.
Montana: Shopping involves a choice between JC Penny's and Norman's Western Wear. And most people choose the latter.

in other news, the animal count is now: deer (5), red fox (6), mountain goats (22), snakes (1), moose (0), bears (3)
Miles hiked so far (approx): 71

One last entertaining tidbit: The lodge is currently hosting about 30 German tourists in the middle of a cross-country motorcycle voyage. They're a boisterous bunch all identically clad in black, leather Harley Davidson gear, shouting German phrases across the parking lot, and (of course) buying a lot of beer. Also, I saw an SUV earlier this week with enormous bison horns.

florence

I went for a really great hike today with a few other employees here. Six of us total, we set off in search of some waterfalls. There was one trail that caught our interest because none of us had been on it before, so we parked and set off. After about two miles nearly straight down, we hit the first falls - a two-tiered bubbling stretch of the river that gracefully cascaded over the rocks. Because the water here is so clear, you could see deep into the pool at all the patriotically colored stones (red, white, and blue). From there we continued another 3 miles to reach the Florence Falls, our ultimate destination. This was by far the most spectacular waterfall I've ever seen. It began several hundred feet up the mountain and fell in a stepping stone manner, spraying mist everywhere and roaring so loudly I couldn't hear the person next to me. We rested there for a while before turning around and attacking the five mile hike up to the road. On our way, we saw a young doe who was much more curious than frightened. Since we all froze in our tracks, she walked very close to us before heading off the trail to snack. This brings the wildlife sightings to: deer (3), red fox (1), moose (0), bears (0), and assorted other critters (many).

In other news, the experience of living and working here continues to become more ridiculous every day. Let me introduce you to another character. Athena, as in the Greek goddess, runs the gift shop for the lodge. On a typical day, Athena wears a track suit of all one color - white, black, lime green - whatever suits her fancy - with an enormous, color-contrasting scrunchie to tie her artificially blonde hair. I don't think she knows yet that scrunchies went out of style in the early 1990s. She's not an enormous woman, but she's also certainly not a pixie. While she could stand to lose a few dozen pounds, she will proudly tell you that she is an exceptional athlete with focus on her sports 24/7. Athena is a truly accomplished woman, as she will tell you in no uncertain terms. She is an ordained minister, an acupuncturist excellent at working out knots, usuing your pressure points, and getting rid of inner demons, a world-class athlete, a heartbreaker, an aura-reader... Not only this, but she can accurately predict your future based of the flows and dips and curls of your handwriting! A direct quote: "Basically, I can do everything." Truly, Athena is a Greek goddess descended to our lowly, mortal level. I am honored to know this woman. Fortunately, my roommate works in the gift shop, so she is able to share all these hilarious stories with me...

mountain folk

Many of the employees here, especially repeaters, are an unusual breed of mountain folk. A full set of teeth is hard to come by, although nearly everyone has a complete working knowledge of shotguns, chewing tobacco, beer, and beef jerky. The older men who work here all walk with a heavy swagger, cowboy boots and a cowboy hat, and the biggest silver belt buckles - usually featuring some type of wildlife (eagles, moose) and turquoise. The women, on the other hand, all have the most sun-damaged wrinkly skin and tend to sport jeans and a denim jacket. It seems the ideal is to find a set where the exact hue of blue is identical, but really any denim jacket will do. From afar, it's hard to distinguish the men from the women... Most conversations I've observed between the mountain folk include a lot of laughing, screaming, and "hey"s. I don't really understand "hey" because it seems to have several different meanings out here. First, it serves as a greeting, just like in real civilization (ex: "Hey! How are you?"). Second, you can just interject it anywhere in a story with a little upswing of the tone and everyone will repeat it back to you. (ex: "So I was walking down the road - hey! -" "Hey!" "- when I saw the bear.") Maybe it's a way to make sure everyone's paying attention to what you're saying...? And third, it seems to provide emphasis to pretty much anything else. (ex: She had really put on a lot of weight. Hey.") Most converssations are dominated by "hey". I suppose I should view this experience as a solid reminder to me of how colorful and diverse the US population really is, and how isolated my circle can be. There is definitely a biased range of students at Hopkins, but this is also unusual by less-academic standards. My roommate from middle-of-nowhere-Ohio even mentioned that this does not resemble real civilization. Her town has 1400 people.

Today, Carole, a real Montana woman born and bred, and I had a little chat. She's the head property gardener who grew up just down the road - 62 years ago. She doesn't look a day under 75. Carole is the epitome of a mountain woman - the swagger, the denim, the muddy boots. She's always cheery and ready to share her life story (which I've now heard), smiling with her one tooth and waving at everyone. I have to mention this little story because our chat took place at the grocery store while I was ringing up her goods - including a tiny tube of toothpaste. (Gotta keep that last tooth healthy!) I'd hate to tell her it's too late.

A few notes on the character of MT: At the store yesterday, we tried to find a radio station to help pass the time. All three of the stations reachable from here were varieties of extra-twangy country music, so instead we popped in a twangy Kentucky bluegrass CD. Fortunately, one of the managers brought us a few mixed CDs to play - mixes of different country artists, that is. Yay.... The only two newspapers available here are the Great Falls Tribune of Great Falls, MT and the Glacier Review...no New York Times or Washington Post, nor any demand for them. Pickup trucks are the clear majority, sedans dating back to pre-1995 the large minority, and cars from the most recent decade are extremely rare, at least until tourist season really starts. The only place with internet is by the bar, which nobody seems to find strange, and one particularly popular type of locally brewed beer is called "Moose Drool"...appetizing... Being "vegetarian" just means you'll have lettuce and tomatoes (vegetables) on your cheeseburger. Tabasco tastes good on everything.

That's it for now, but more to come...

welcome to montana

So, I made it. I'm in Montana.

My first day, I met with the H.R. lady and found out that I am actually working in the grocery store, at least for the first week or so. From there, I had a brief - very brief - training as I began my eight hour shift.

I ended up walking back to the cabins (ha!) after dark and the path was lit purely by moonlight. It was amazing how well I could see - not only the road in front of me but also both the big and little dippers. It's about 3/4 of a mile up the hill to the Employee Village (EV from here on out), but so far I've enjoyed the walk.

This morning, my roommate and I went for a short hike in the park where I bought my pass. We walked right along the lakeside and couldn't have happened upon better weather. The sky was completely cloudless, and the lakes held a clear reflection of the surrounding snow-capped mountains. It was truly breathtaking.

As for now, I'm exhausted and off to bed. More later...